Saturday night Sam went for a Coldstone run. The peanut butter, almond, Oreo, and whipped cream in chocolate ice cream was absolutely calling my name. Utterly and completely.
Now there is a real art to the pickup and return of Coldstone ice cream to one's home. The children must not know where you have been or of what heavenly indulgence you are about to partake. Let's just say there is a lot of creeping, tiptoeing, and muffling involved.
Upon returning home, Sam shut the front door a little too loudly (Rule #1--Discretion at ALL Times) and as a result came the squawk from a nearby bedroom, "Where were you, Dad?"
"I uh...had to...run an errand." (Rule #2--A Clever Cover-Up should be rehearsed beforehand. You should never be caught off guard by this kind of question.)
We slinked downstairs where we did partake of our Coldstone Contraband. We watched a movie and then headed off to bed. A beautiful evening.
The next morning Seth approached me in the kitchen. Our conversation went as follows:
Seth (stating a fact): "Mom, you and Dad had ice cream last night."
Me (innocently): "Why ever do you say that, Seth?" (Admittedly in side I was cringing. We had never been caught before.)
Seth (smugly): "First off, last night Dad left somewhere and said he went on an 'errand' (refer to Rule #2). Secondly I saw a bag in the garbage that said 'Coldstone' and had a picture of ice cream on it. (What the? How could Sam be so careless? He needlessly broke Rule #3--Destroy All Evidence. You don't just throw your garbage away and call it good. No! One must bury evidence at the BOTTOM of the garbage can and if need be shred, tear, or burn anything remaining that may be deemed suspicious.) Third, (Seth continued) I saw plastic spoons in the garbage......and they SMELLED like chocolate." (BAM. Caught red handed. You can't argue with that, which brings us to Rule #4--Never underestimate your child's use of ALL senses when trying to uncover a plot that convicts his parents.)
Abram, who must have been eavesdropping in on our conversation, pipes up from another room, "You have to admit, Mom, that's some pretty good evidence." I couldn't agree more. We shall have to be more vigilant in the future.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
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6 comments:
I think the secret is out of the bag.
wow your kids are good. I seriously don't think my kids would catch on. They can hear a candy bag opening form downstairs though so if we stick to non candy bag things we are golden.
Oh no! Now what will you do?
That's amazing, some good sleuthing going on. I just blatantly eat it after they're in bed and tell them that when they're a grown up they can go and get ice cream. :) Probably I just know I can't be sneaky enough, so I don't try. :)
Next time, have Sam buy some broccoli to sprinkle over the evidence. They wont go near it.
That cracks me up! Impressive work on Seth's part! :)
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